Filed under: pregnancy phenomena
some time ago, i went to the movies to see “the aviator.” as i watched it, i thought to myself, this is a VERY loose interpretation of howard hughes’ life!
later, the aviator was nominated for several oscars. i was asked to participate in an oscars pool wherein most of the votes seemed to favor the aviator. my friends either liked it or begrudgingly agreed that it was technically good though they didn’t especially enjoy it. in both cases, i was confused. maybe i have bad taste? then, IT WON. a bunch of oscars!
finally, i spoke up. i said, “you guys, the aviator wasn’t good! it wasn’t even a good biopic! it was futuristic and weird and had nothing to do with howard hughes!” someone questioned me: ”when did you go see the aviator?”
“we saw it in the theater. you were there!”
“i haven’t seen the aviator.”
“you have, too!”
“no i haven’t. you and i went to see sky captain and the world of tomorrow.”
“oh.”
this situation is something like what i am constantly experiencing lately: the condition that was described to me as pregnancy brain.
Filed under: complaining
people have begun to notice that my ankles are swollen.
“see, your little sneakers are leaving marks!”
“i can’t see your ankle bone.”
“do you think you should put your feet up?”
pregnant bodies are communal property, so everyone feels free to comment on each change, no matter how small. my fingernails are whiter, yes, and this side of my hair IS freaking out.
This afternoon we went for a an ultrasound to find out if Wich Baby is a boy or a girl and lo and behold, after a few swipes of the ultrasound wand, it turns out that come December, the ratio of guys to gals around our house will be raised to 2:1. We did some quick text messaging (aunts, friends, etc.) to announce the news, though I doubt many high stakes wagers hinged on the outcome. We got a DVD of the ultrasound in motion and once we got home we watched the action again, laughing at our baby making arm motions that resembled an in utero version of the mashed potato. Unfortunately for realism’s sake, the video was accompanied by piano music more befitting a buffet at a senior community orientation brunch. When looking at the image above, be sure to hum Monster Mash to yourself.
-Nathan
i keep getting chastised for not drinking enough milk/not eating enough protein or vegetables. there aren’t enough hours in the day to eat the amount of food it seems i’m being directed to eat. now i know how poor amy kochalka felt:
www.americanelf.com
love,
stefanie
